Ask the Expert: There's a girl I like at work...


Question:Hey Christine, I was wondering what the first steps would be to entering into a relationship? There's a girl I like at work and I get the feeling that it might be a mutual thing. It's just been all small talk so far though. Can you give me tips on what to say and how to approach pursuing long term relationships?


Answer: Dear TR,

Quick, get out of the friend zone. You've got to ask her out ASAP or you will become her "guy at work that she flirts with but hasn't thought about dating". I want you to approach her for a Date not a Long-Term Relationship. That's far too much pressure. Think of something she has mentioned that you want to know more about, like where she is from, her past summer holidays or a sport that she does. Or maybe there is something at work that you think she would know more about than you. This will be your 'in' for asking her out for a simple coffee. Eg, "You mentioned that you went on a trip to Italy last summer. I'd love to hear more and maybe even see your pictures. Can I take you out for a coffee sometime?" This "take you out" puts a clear signal as to your intentions. She will know you are asking her on a date. Once she says yes and you have an enjoyable coffee date, wait a few days and then maybe ask her to do something outside of work hours. Don't ask her out again right away and certainly not when you are on your first date. For a second date, ask her for something simple like a coffee on the weekend or even a movie. Don?t move too quickly though because you want things to unfold as they should rather than making things uncomfortable at work. Good luck!

To your authenticity,

Love, Christine

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