New Year

New Year, Renewed Love: How to Make Your Relationship Feel New Again… No Matter How Long You’ve Been Together


For many people across the world, the New Year offers the unique opportunity to resolve to make a change. It offers the chance to take a step forward and become a better version of one’s self. It’s a time that offers a feeling of renewal, hope and opportunity. For those in relationships, this could mean resolving to make a change, or improvement, as a partnership. What I’d like to share with you in this post, dear friend, is how to see the New Year as an opportunity to do just that. Resolve, along with your partner, to renewing the sense of joy and “newness” that you once had in your relationship – no matter how long you’ve been together for at this point. Let's talk about how to make your relationship feel new again. There are so many incredible things that people discover and learn about one another as they embark on a life together. The countless shared experiences help both partners grow, evolve and get to know each other on a profoundly deep level. At the same time, however, relationships do tend to lose the fresh or new feeling – and the excitement that comes with those sensations – the early stages had.

And, you know what? It happens all the time and it's actually unavoidable. Every couple experiences it. In this day and age, it can be difficult to slow down and search out that feeling of excitement. You both have jam-packed schedules and are always on the go. Evenings and weekends are likely to fill up fast with so many things to do that, at the end of the day, you haven’t any time to spare. But as things slow down around the holidays, and the New Year rolls around with its reminder to resolve, there’s really no better time. So, let’s explore how you can make your relationship feel new again. All it takes is your commitment and a few simple steps!

1. Plan Quality Time Together, Just Like When You First Met

When you were first getting to know each other, however long ago that might have been, surely you didn’t sit with devices in hand, half-watching TV and making minimal conversation. Car rides together were filled with conversation, questions and new discoveries. Dinners out were romantic, adventurous and brimming with possibilities of what might happen after. Make this sort of real, committed quality time a priority in the New Year. Even if it’s once a week, set aside a couple of hours during which there are zero distractions and give yourselves the opportunity to reconnect and rediscover one another. Don't shy away from using resources like lists of icebreaker questions or deeper random ones you can easily find online. You don't have to come up with everything on your own!

2. Be Open to Trying Something New

You’ll probably find that, as you begin to put yourself in a new relationship mindset, a certain sense of spontaneity emerges within you both. Be open to this unpredictability and be truly open to trying new things. It could be a new restaurant, a spontaneous trip out of the city, something adventurous in the bedroom or anything in between. Try your best to keep an open mind and go with the flow – sometimes it’s these sort of unplanned situations that allow immense growth to reveal itself.

3. Regularly Practice Gratitude and Appreciation

When you first began dating, you were likely to appreciate even the smallest of gestures made by your partner. Now, years or even decades later, you’ve probably grown accustomed to these same gestures. They’re no longer as special or notable as they used to be. Why is that? Well, friend, it’s because after time we grow more comfortable and can forget to practice appreciation as we once did. This New Year, I encourage you to resolve to practicing appreciation on a regular basis. Show your partner that you acknowledge and appreciate even the simplest of gestures such as making dinner or jumping out of the car to pump the gas. Remember that both of you give and take and that your partner is deserving of celebration just as you are. Men and women equally like to feel appreciated, and trust me, there is no way you can become overly appreciative as long as it is coming from a genuine place and a dedication to your partnership.

To your authenticity,

Love, Christine

Want to Become a Certified Dating Coach and Help Others Find Love?


How Welcoming the New Year with Tidying Can Bring Love to Your Life


So often around New Year's we become completely focused on feeling like the only single person in a world that seems filled with couples. The unsolicited advice on why we haven't found someone yet doesn't help either. So given all of this, wouldn't it be nice to encourage a totally different approach to our love life as we welcome in the New Year? I truly believe it’s the perfect time to go within, create quiet space on your own and wind down a year… and then welcome a brand new one. Often when I work with clients, we "clear the clutter" in order to invite love into our lives. It’s an excellent opportunity to take care of the things in your life that are causing you stress in your world. Annnnd, hint, hint, what I'm really getting at here is when your "to do" list doesn't seem so gigantic, you are more likely to create time to make your love life a priority. :) 1) Clothes & Laundry

I know, you might be thinking, "Christine, really? Laundry?" It's about cleansing, so the first step I encourage you to do is take everything out of your closet and drawers and really look at it. Which pieces make you happy? Are there some things you might wear after a good dry clean? You want to get your closet to a place where you love everything so if you don't love it, give it away or prep it for consignment. This brings me to laundry, the consignment pile can be washed and prepped. With items that you want to keep, divide them into categories so that you don't have lots of duplicates or to just double check that everything fits well and is in good shape.

2) The Kitchen

Something as simple as reorganizing the kitchen cupboards can make way for a strong sense of lightness in a person’s life.  Feeling as though you have less to do when you arrive home at the end of the day will keep your chore list from weighing you down and will allow you to say, "Yes!" more easily to new opportunities! When making your way through your kitchen cupboards, be sure to only keep the items that you regularly use. Have you never, ever used a mixing bowl but can't bear to part with it? Commit to using it at least once a month. If a month later you still haven't used it, then it's time to reconsider. Another tip I once read about is to make sure that every single ingredient, dish and appliance is within reach. Everything in your kitchen should be easily accessible. If it isn't, you're surely not going to use it - now or in the future. Group items in your fridge that you don't use very often and try to keep them separate from the items you use regularly. And, dear friend, don't forget to tackle the freezer - a great place to let go of things we haven't felt inspired to use. Create space!

3) Purge What Doesn’t Bring You Joy

Marie Kondo, famed Japanense organizing consultant, regularly emphasizes the importance of discarding belongings that do not “spark joy.” As you walk through your home or make your way room to room, place your hands on every single item and ask yourself, “Does this bring me joy?” If the answer is no, or if you can’t make up your mind, it’s time to say goodbye to that item. Wherever you live, there are donation centres that would jump at the chance to bring your items to someone in need. The items that no longer bring you joy or spark a true feeling of love will surely bring those feelings to someone else. Kondo advises to act quickly and swiftly and not let a friend or family member look through your “discard bags” as they’re likely to talk you out of cleansing all that you’ve chosen to. So many women have fallen in love with this method of choosing what stays and what goes, so why not you?

4) Make Getting Ready Exciting

You know that sense of excitement you get when you try on a new lipstick or get to wear a new dress or pair of jeans that make you look amazing? Bring that spectacular, “I look goooood” feeling to your every morning by creating a closet and “getting ready” space that works with you – instead of against you. A squished, messy and overfilled closet is much more likely to bring about feelings of anxiety than excitement. So, when you think about having to pick out an outfit for a date or find something to wear to grab a drink with friends, it’s no wonder you may be tempted to say “No, thanks.”

By cleansing your closet, drawers and “getting ready” area and allowing all of the items left to breathe and own their own space; you’ll make getting ready exciting again. You’ll rediscover your personal style and the clothing and beauty products that make you happiest.

5) Say Goodbye Without Guilt

Guilt is one of the strongest reasons we hold onto items from the past. Perhaps you bought a t-shirt or skirt that you’ve never worn. Does tossing it without having even worn it once make you feel guilty? Maybe your mother gave you a vase or dish that you know you’ll never use. But, does handing it over to someone else make you feel guilty for getting rid of something you received as a gift?

Guilt is not a reason to leave your home cluttered or to hold onto anything that doesn’t expressly bring you feelings of joy. Remind yourself that the things you no longer love (or perhaps never loved to begin with) will bring happiness and delight to someone else. And, dear friend, know that your happiness is so much more important than finding valuable storage space for something you neither love nor plan to use.

Doing these seemingly small but impactful things helps clear up space in your life, mind and heart so you won’t feel as bogged down as you start 2016. You’ll feel less inclined to decline a night out or weekend away because you took the time to focus your energy on you in order to set yourself up for success.

To your authenticity,

Love, Christine

Want to Become a Certified Dating Coach and Help Others Find Love?

5 New Year's Resolution Ideas for Married Couples


The New Year is here and so are 365 more days and chances to live a happier, more fulfilling and more authentic life. For married couples, this sort of happiness often feels as though it depends on more than a single partner – it’s a joint effort to actively take steps towards improvement and happiness. In this post I’m sharing five New Year’s resolution ideas for married couples, so that you might be inspired to work together towards achieving something beautiful in 2015.

Couples Resolution 1: Do More Small Nice Things, Not Just on Special Days

This particular resolution is a highly effective one if you both vow to put in the work. You know how great you feel when you come home to the laundry put away or dinner ready on the table? Those small everyday acts of kindness have a much larger impact on your happiness and the health of your relationship.

This year, resolve to do more small nice things for one another – not just on birthdays, anniversaries or holidays! Putting away the dishes, doing the laundry, making the bed, cooking a meal or even pouring a glass of wine and putting on a movie are all small acts that will make you both feel more loved and happier.

Couples Resolution 2: Make More Physical Contact

Human touch is a transformative act, and I’m not just talking about sex. Holding your partner’s hand, giving them a neck massage after a long day at work, stroking their hair or even sitting with your hand on their leg are all physical acts of touch that aren’t necessarily sexual. Resolving to make more physical contact in 2015 will allow you to feel closer, communicate more regularly and feel a greater connection between the two of you. And yes, it will probably wind up encouraging you to spend more time in the bedroom…that brings us to the next resolution for couples!

Couples Resolution 3: Make Intimacy a Priority

A lack of physical intimacy in a romantic relationship can be incredibly harmful. Sex is a key component of a healthy adult marriage, and yet it often takes the back burner to a number of other things. This year, resolve to stop allowing long hours, fatigue or simply feeling “blah” to kibosh any possibility of physical intimacy. Many couples mind it helpful to schedule date nights and plan ahead, so don’t hesitate to do the same if busy schedules are often a problem.

Spending more time in the bedroom with your partner can lead to a stronger bond, increased individual confidence, heightened communication and a long-lasting bond between the two of you. Allowing yourself to sit on the couch and feel stressed after a long day at work offers none of the above benefits!

Couples Resolution 4: Argue More Effectively

Let’s be honest, all couples have arguments from time to time. It’s a natural part of partnership and can actually lead to a stronger relationship. However, how you argue makes all the difference and doing it the wrong way can have serious negative impacts on both you and your partner. This year, make arguing more effectively a priority – or communicating more effectively overall – and watch your relationship blossom.

When communicating, avoid playing the blame game. Use terms like, “I feel” and “When you X, I feel Y” instead of accusatory language – something I wrote about recently and encourage you to read more on. Practicing active listening and nipping problems in the bud instead of allowing them to fester will have you remembering 2015 as a very good year.

To your authenticity,

Love, Christine

Want to Become a Certified Dating Coach and Help Others Find Love?